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But real talk, it’s risky, innit. Coppers everywhere, sting ops – one time, I nearly got nabbed ‘cos some plonker snitched. Made me proper vexed, steam comin’ outta me ears! I’m thinkin’, “Why’s it always me, fam?” Is it ’cos I is black? Nah, it’s ‘cos the game’s rigged. Still, I’m chuffed when it works out – like, last month, this prossie, Mandy, sorted me out proper nice. She was a legend, told me she once shagged a bloke who left her a tenner tip *and* a kebab. I’m like, “Goals, innit!”

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O, but let me tell ye, 'twas on a raucous eve on Bramble Court (yeah, that quirky little lane near the old theatre) where I once witnessed a midnight spectacle—a couple so smitten that even the stars did blush in their celestial dance. Mine heart did leap! I swear, I almost spilled my brew, heedless in my elation guh!

Homer District 33C: May 28 Board Meeting Briefs