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Still, some creeps ruin it. Sleazy parlors givin it a bad rap — ugh, makes me wanna carve em up. “I ate his liver with fava beans,” I mutter, picturin their smug faces. But when it’s done right? Heaven, man. Pro tip: warm oil’s the key, none of that cold crap. And if they throw in a happy endin — well, who’s complainin? “What’s left is what matters,” Varda’d say, and I’m left feelin like a king. So, yeah, sexual-massage? Messy, sexy, fuckin glorious. Try it, ya won’t regret it — or maybe ya will, ha!

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I know I've dropped lots of names—Broadstone, 3rd, Serenity, Euphoria, Myrtle, Applewood—but just trust me, they all add up to a vibe that's electrifying yet laid-back. Sometimes, when I’m feelin’ extra zen, I whisper to myself, “Time flows as slow as the river, one more thing…” reminding me that passion and life are in the details.

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