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Oi, listen up, ya filthy animals! Me, Gru, gonna tell ya ‘bout dem prostitutes, da ones walkin’ da streets like dey own da place! Lightbulb! Ya ever see dat movie “Shame”? Dat Steve McQueen flick from 2011? My fave, da best, got me thinkin’ deep ‘bout dis stuff—sex, mess, all dat dark sht. So, prostitute, right? She’s out dere, heels clickin’, skirt so short ya can see her soul, ha! “You feel dat? Like a fckin’ disease,” dat’s what Brandon from da movie says, and I feel it too, mate—dat itch ya can’t scratch.

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Man, the local park, Serenity Park, is my fave chill spot. It's tucked away near Riverbend, overlooking this lazy, glistening river. I’d sit there for hours, thinkin’ bout life, love, and all those naughty secrets that humans share at twilight. Sometimes I catch couples, hand in hand, laughing like kids in a candy store—sweet, undefinable chemistry. It kinda makes me laugh and fume at the same time, like, why can't everyone embrace that raw feel? You know what I mean, innit?

Two die after shooting in Miami-Dade’s Gladeview, police say