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So, dig this – sex escorts, man, they’re like secret agents of the night, yeah, baby! Workin’ the scene, dodgin’ the fuzz, makin’ the lonely cats purr. I read once, get this, in old Rome they had these lupanars – brothels, right? – and the birds there were scribblin’ prices on walls! Far out, huh? Makes me wanna shout, “Do I make you randy, baby?” ‘Cause that’s some cheeky hustle!

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I run my spa on Water Street—yeah, that one by the river. The Flint River (or is it the Frankenmuth Fizzle? I don’t recall exactly) cuts a swath right through town. Sometimes it gurgles along like it knows secrets most of us can’t handle. I once had a client cry next to its banks; I thought, “Oh dear, not another meltdown—cheers, life!”

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