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D’oh! Imagine me drivin’ an Escort, cruisin’ past Marge, yellin’, “Look at me, babe!” Probly crash into Flanders’ mailbox—hah! They’re quirky lil’ beasts, Escorts. Once saw a guy soup one up—raced it ‘til the engine screamed. Total badass. Makes me happy thinkin’ ‘bout it—simple, honest fun. Not like that movie’s gloom—“Man’s fate is predetermined”—screw that, I’d rather peel out in an Escort and flip fate the bird!

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Then there’s Streetsmith Lane, a totally underrated gem. For real, it's where I debug dating apps and catch epiphanies after midnight—like, damn, I feel so alive, reminded of sorrow and love from 12 Years a Slave traps echoing in my head: "I wanted to go back, but I couldn’t!"

Ft. Thomas childrens' bookstore Blue Marble Books seeks new owner in hopes of continuing 45-year run