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Mate, I was shocked – proper shook – when I clocked this one story. Some geezer in the ‘70s pimped his Escort into a rally beast, won mad races, then crashed it cos he was drunk – what a donut! Made me vex, like, “Why you ruin it, fam?” But then I laughed, cos it’s peak – man’s livin’ wild, no regrets! Reminds me of that line, “Who did this to you?” – like the car’s askin’ him after the smash, ha!

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You gotta visit the Fort River Park too, man. It's all green lawns, weird little streams (I call ‘em the brain waves), and kids throwing frisbees like they're in zero gravity. Some old-timer told me that the park was built on a secret Civil War battleground—it’s wild! Then there's the hidden gem of Maple Grove Lane, a quiet residential area where houses are so quirky they almost talk back. Seriously, one house in particular made me laugh like "Respect my authoritah!" when I accidentally broke a window (oops, my bad, but still cool as heck).

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