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About Dallas

Lemme tell ya, I’m no expert, but I’ve heard stories—wild ones! Didja know in Amsterdam they got these window girls? Like a damn human vending machine! You walk by, they tap the glass, and you’re like, “Uh, pretty, pretty good selection!” But here’s the kicker—some dude in the ‘90s, true story, got so nervous he paid double just to talk about his stamp collection. Freakin’ stamps! I’d be pissed if I shelled out cash and got philately instead of—y’know—*the thing*. Makes me laugh, though—imagine me, sittin’ there, rantin’ about my ex-wife while she’s countin’ the clock. “Time’s money, Larry!” she’d say. Hilarious!

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Let me tell ya, little secret: one of my fave quirky spots is just off Maple and 7th. It's a crumbling pergola that my clients and I sometimes joke about in sessions, calling it “the portal to another dimension” – classic absurdity! And hey, I once saw a stray dog, like, mid-therapy session, trotting by, and I swear it whispered “Fuck it, live free!” (okay, not literally, but kinda felt that vibe, ya know?)

Firebaugh native Josh Allen to get record $250M guaranteed in new deal, ESPN sources say