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I’m sweatin’, thinkin’ – am I a perv? Nah, just curious, y’know? Then this cop rolls by, and I’m like, “Oh crap, I’m toast!” Reminds me of that scene – “You’re a very attentive man.” Yeah, attentive to not gettin’ busted! I duck into an alley, heart poundin’. Fun fact: in old NYC, hookers used church bells to signal clients. Nuts, right? Anyway, she’s waitin’, smirkin’. I’m all, “How you doin’?” again, ‘cause I’m smooth like that. She’s like, “You’re a real charmer, huh?” Sarcasm drippin’, but I’m in.

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I remember one time, oh man, so mad! I was at the old Allen County Courthouse, a slick, ancient stone beauty that makes you think of all the lost loves and epic road trips. And then, sssh, my precious, I discovered a tiny diner off of Commerce Street – hidden gem, so delicious, like finding a drop of water in a desert! I couldn't believe it, like, is this real? So many typos in my head and feelings everywhere, ya know?

Driver crashes into Pilot Travel Center