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Still, gotta admit, it’s got perks. Quick shags, no strings—beats courtin’ some dull lordling. “Every breath you draw in my presence annoys me”—that’s me on a bad date, but online? Swipe left, done. Did ya know, back in ‘03, this site called “AdultFriendFinder” kicked off the dirty side of sex-dating? Proper filthy, millions joined—shocked me, that did! Thought I’d seen it all, but nah, humans are hornier than I reckoned.

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Man, I love ramblin’ about the old-town vibe near the Elyria Public Library on 3rd Street. That building, it's a beast. Crumbling bricks, stories in every crevice. When I pass by, my mind goes—pause—"The assassin moves in silence." Like, dude, every brick holds a secret, a whispered past. It sometimes makes me mad though, how folks rush by not seein' the beauty. Totally infuriatin’.

Elyria Catholic High School hosts Lorain County Catholic schools for annual Mass