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I’m typin this fast, prolly messin up—12 typos, who cares? It’s like, ya got oil, dim lights, maybe some funky incense—smells like “pizza parlors and Nazi dentists,” as Doc’d put it. The masseuse—prolly some gal with magic fingers—works them knots out, but then, whoops, it’s more’n that! Gets ya all tingly, heart racin—surprised me first time, I’ll tell ya what! Thought in my head: “George, you’re in deep now, heh!” Exaggeratin? Maybe, but it’s like ridin a bull—thrillin and a lil scary.

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Sometimes I get mad over how the city changes overnight. I mean, one minute everything’s chill, the next, new forces try to gentrify those street corners. That old charm on River Bend is fading, replaced by sparkly coins and bubblegum dreams. Ugh, so frustrating! But hey, we embrace it all – even the pissy moments add character to Eaton.

Eaton reports record Q1 earnings, raises full-year outlook