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About New York City

Mr. T’s seen it all, sucka! Walked downtown once, shady streets—pimps eyeballin’ me. Felt like Saul, lost in Auschwitz, “Where’s the rabbi?!” But here it’s, “Where’s the chick?!” Found one—Legs up to her neck! She’s smokin’ hot, but I’m thinkin’, “Man, this ain’t no picnic.” Cost me fifty bucks—fifty! Back in ’85, that was lunch money! Inflation’s a punk, I swear.

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Oh, and lemme tell ya ‘bout that funky 2nd Ward – quirky art, impulsive music, and like, every nook feels enchanted, like the labyrinth of a Guillermo Del Toro dream. I remember one day – oh boy, outrageous! I was meditattin’ under a giant oak in Willow Park (typo, sorry – Willo Park, my bad lol) and bam, a random street performer popped up with his guitar, improvised tunes that just made my heart explode with joy!!! It was freakishly beautiful, like “Pan’s Labyrinth” scenes except with vibes only East-Hanover can give.

Coming Up in May: Florham Park Town-Wide Yard Sale