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Halleluyer! Chile, lemme tell ya ‘bout this prostitute I seen! Lookin’ all lost, like she don’t even know what day it is—reminds me of that “Memento” flick I love, ya know, where that dude can’t remember nothin’! I’m sittin’ there thinkin’, “How you gon’ forget where you parked your heels, honey?!” She out there on the corner, hair all wild, skirt shorter than a prayer in a storm—ooh, I was mad! Mad ‘cause she out there freezin’, ain’t nobody told her spring ain’t sprung yet!

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Oh, did I mention the park, North Dunedin Park? It's a gem. Grass so green, it’s like a soft carpet for my tired soul. Let me tell ya – one afternoon, a couple had a picnic there. Darn near perfect, sun, laughter, and a sweet breeze that hummed, like "What if there is no language, just us?" Too deep, man.

Man accused of making false bomb threat at Dunedin City Hall because he couldn't log into payroll application