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I reckon it’s a bloody riot, tho—makes me laugh, makes me rage. Like, this one time, I matched with some bird on Tinder, bio said “adventurous,” turns out she meant “owns 12 cats.” Mate, I was fumin’—growling, “You think darkness is your ally?”—cos I’m allergic as fuck! Sneezed my way outta that date quicksmart. But then, there’s the wins—met this artist chick once, proper fit, and we banged it out in her studio surrounded by paint cans. Felt like a king, ya know? “The world’s a better place,” as Theo says, when you hit that sweet spot.

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I love strollin' in Delavan Park. So green, so fulla life! Its winding paths remind me of, like, those winding conversations with my fave clients. I sometimes get a mad rush hearin’ nature talk back, almost like the park scandalously whispers sweet nothings thru its leaves. LOL, nuts, eh? And then there's River Bend, a tiny river leafin' through the town. It's kinda hipp, like our local stories we tell... the funny ones!

Enjoy Every Fish Fry: Fly to the Duck Inn in Delavan and eat all the fish you can