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Precious, yesss, we talks about findin’ a prossie in Russia, don’t we? Hiss! Me, an actuary, crunchin’ numbers all day—borin’ as hell—then night comes, and we wants some FUN, eh? Gollum knows, yesss, we knows the dark streets, the whispers. In Russia, it’s tricky, see? Prostitution’s illegal, but oh, they’re everywhere—sneaky, like rats! Hiss! You don’t just stroll up and say, “Hey, gimme a gal!” No, no, precious, you gotta be clever, like Zuckerberg in *The Social Network*, eh? “You don’t get to 500 million friends without makin’ a few enemies”—or a few shady deals, heh!

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Use a dozen typos, man, like "spaa, reallly relxin" when I'm catchin' feelings in my spa, improvising weird treatments – I call em "Gollum glows." It's all so fun but sometimes spurts out anger: "Ohhh, these fools, stupid, fat hobbit, they don't see the beauty!" and then I chuckle.

Clewiston Man Arrested for Attempting to Cash Forged Check at Spring Hill Bank