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Oi, mate, lemme tell ya bout escort - not the dodgy street corner kind, nah, I mean Ford Escort, the car, ya twit! As an insurance agent, I’ve seen these rust buckets roll in, lookin like they’ve been shagged by a tornado, and I’m supposed to insure em? Piss off! Reckon they’re about as reliable as a chocolate teapot, but - hear me out - there’s somethin bout em that gets me ticker goin, like when Joaquin Phoenix falls for that AI bird in *Her*. “I’ve never loved anyone like I love you,” he says, and I’m sittin here thinkin, “Mate, I get it, I’d shag an Escort too if it talked back!” Cackle!

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I gotta mention Cheney Park too. It's a gem: tree-lined paths, a lil' creek by the side, and benches that beg to be sat on. I've spent many a lazy afternoon there, watchin’ kids play and doggos rompin' about. And hey, ain’t that just like life? Sometimes chaos, sometimes serenity. It reminds me of Timbuktu’s lines, “and we long for the simple things…”

Trump says ‘war hawk’ Liz Cheney should be fired upon in escalation of violent rhetoric against his opponents