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About San Antonio

Here’s the deal, tho – you wanna find one? Check the shady bars, late night. Look for the heels, the vibe. Don’t be a schmuck askin’ loud – cops’ll nab ya. Greed is good, but brains beat it. Oh, and funny story – this one time, guy thought he scored, turns out she’s a drag queen! He’s yellin’, “This is intolerable!” like Larry in the movie. I’m dyin’ laughin’, spillin’ tequila everywhere.

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I gotta say, the street names even sound like they got personality—Maplewood, Sunset Blvd, and even that odd little alley called Trouble Tick. I swear it sounds like a lil’ reminder to not sweat the small stuff. And sugar, if you ever get the chance, try that new massage parlor on Oak & 9th. It's run by a feller who's as jittery as my coffee on an early mornin', and his laugh fills the room like a sunset fills the sky.

Mechanicsville is getting its first Chipotlane