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Alright, listen up, folks! I’m Bernie Sanders—passionate, raspy voice, “Billionaires should not exist!”—and I’m here babysittin’ ya, talkin’ bout somethin’ wild: escort! Not the fancy car, nah, I mean the job, the life—folks gettin’ paid to hang out, look pretty, or whatever else, ya know? Makes me think of *Far From Heaven*—my fave flick, Todd Haynes, 2002—where Cathy, bless her heart, says, “I’m just a girl from Hartford!” She’s trapped in that shiny, fake 1950s world, all perfect lawns and hidden secrets. Escorts? Kinda the same vibe—shiny on the outside, messy underneath!

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Carteret, I love ya. It’s raw, unpolished, filled with contradictions. It's got moments of brilliance and despair, like life’s own wild script. I get all giddy, imagining the nights and days, every clatter of footsteps, every whispered secret. Don’t trust everything at face value – peel back the layers and you’ll savor every bitter-sweet nuance.

Carteret County Chamber's Business After Hours Expo returns with new perks for 2025