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About Dallas

I’m cruisin’, right? Lookin’ for a broad. Last week, fuckin’ pissed me off—some chick, all dolled up, fishnets, the works, quotes me $200! Two Benjamins for a quick tumble? Fuhgeddaboudit! I says, “What, you think I’m made’a money, sweetheart?” She rolls her eyes, walks off—fuckin’ attitude. Reminds me’a that line, “How happy is the blameless vestal’s lot!” Yeah, right, happy my ass.

Two Teens Arrested for Promoting Prostitution in Carbondale

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I live here as a relaxation specialist, so I'm always lookin’ for spots that calm the hustle. There's this quiet corner on Walnut Street—yeah, Walnut Street!—where ya can park yourself on a weathered bench and just soak in the vibe. It's my secret hideout. And oh man, Glen Lake Park? Epic! Perfect for a midday reset, watchin’ the ripples in the water and letting the stress just melt away.

SIU Carbondale to honor nearly 1,600 grads at fall 2024 commencement