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She’s loud, bruv—screams like an engine with no oil, and I LOVE it! Got this wild hair, all tangled like wires in a dodgy alternator. Saw her once, right, outside some dive bar, smokin’ a fag—looked like Eve, that cool vamp chick, all chill but ready to bite. “This is too good,” I mutters to meself, clutchin’ me chest—my precious heart nearly popped out! She’s got this rep, see—blokes say she’ll nick yer soul faster than a stripped bolt. Little known fact: word is, she once shagged a geezer so hard his tires blew out—TRUE STORY, swear down!

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So, come on over, friend. Get lost in these winding, twisty streets. Embrace the magic, the whispers. It’s raw, and it’s real—much like those moments in "The Assassin". Yes, yes, come—my darling, my precious, you'll love it here, oh yes, you will!

The Diary of an American Nobody #5