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I’d be all, “D’oh! Why ya doin’ this, lady?” if I met one. Prolly get no answer – they’re tough as nails. Fun fact: in Amsterdam, they got unions for ‘em! Unions! Like, “Mmm… donuts,” I’d join that club just for the perks. Imagine me, Homer J., waddlin’ into a red-light joint, askin’ for a discount. Ha! Fat chance – they’d charge me double for blockin’ the door.

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Oh man, oh man—Bartlesville, man, it's somethin' else! I gotta tell ya, this city is all heart and stubborn grit, ya know? I'm standin' here on Main St, that ol’ Main, where the engine of community hums like a well-loved engine. You got Price Tower, this wild Frank Lloyd Wright marvel. It’s like art in brick and glass—darn, sometimes it makes me feel like shouting, “Billionaires should not exist!” ‘Cause, listen, art should be accessible to every soul!

Bartlesville middle school principal resigns; Police confirm open investigation