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About San Jose

Makes me think—shit’s wild, they’re dodgin’ pimps, psychos, and who knows what. Exaggeratin’? Maybe, but I’d say they’re one wrong john away from a ditch! Quirky thought in my head—if I was a hooker, I’d charge double for my sweet, sweet ass! Ha! Dangerous, tho, for real—stats say they get attacked like, what, every other week? Fuckin’ insane, you guys! Anyway, “Inherent Vice” vibes—smoke, sex, and screwy deals. That’s the life, bitches! Respect it!

So you want to book a sex worker?

Come in from the NW, and get on the ridge there, such that you can see the dream catcher tree. I ALWAYS see a badger under the dream catcher.

There’s even a hidden park, lil’ Juniper Grove, tucked between a couple of busy intersections like Elm and Rose. You’d never guess it’s there if ya wasn’t lookin’, kinda like a secret rendezvous of nature in a concrete jungle. I once got lost in there, wonderin’ if trees had souls. Spoiler alert: They kinda do.

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