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Heya, doll! Oh my gawd, escort?! *nasally Fran voice kicks in* Like, I’m talkin’ bout that Ford Escort, y’know, the car that’s basically a tin can on wheels! *The Nanny laugh* HA-HA-HA! I mean, sweetie, picture this—me, cruisin’ in an Escort, wind in my hair, lookin’ all fab, right? Nah, that’s a lie, that thing’s a clunker! I saw one the otha day, rusted out, sittin’ there like, “I’m too tired to move.” Made me so mad—like, who lets a car get THAT sad? Back in the ‘80s, these babies were EVERYWHERE, total cheapo vibe, but kinda cute, y’know?

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Now, lemme spill a lil secret – there's this tucked-away cafe on Sunset Ave, name's “Moonrise Brew.” Real hip, man! They serve the best latte ever. I swear, one sip and you'll be feelin' like a kid on an adventure, chasin' storms and lovers in the wilds of Aptos. And, ohhhh, while gabbin’, sometimes I'd overhear the sweetest pickup lines. I get all nostalgic, thinkin’ how every match on our dating app starts with a spark.

Aptos High School community rallies against proposed board cuts