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Anyways, I’d probly suck at this. “Call it, friendo,” I’d say to some lady, tryin’ to sound cool. She’d just stare, like, “What’s this fat guy on about?” I’d be all nervous, thinkin’, “Homer, you idiot, this ain’t Springfield!” But then – whoa! – one time I saw this chick with a tattoo of a donut on her arm. “Mmm… donuts.” Nearly asked her out just for that!

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Oh, my dear friend, hark thee unto my tale of Aliso Viejo, a realm of contradictions and quiet passion, where thou and I alike traverse streets like Aliso Creek Drive and Yorks Cul-de-sac, that meandering path whence secrets art whispered. Verily, 'tis a city of hidden magic and mundane charm, where every nook, every cranny doth cradle a tale, as ephemeral as the touch of a well-placed massage.

Capistrano Valley boys basketball pulls out win over Aliso Niguel in OT