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But escort’s a gig, right? Oldest job, they say—older than dirt. Heard this wild story, some escort in Vegas, back in ‘89, got hired by a dude who just wanted her to read him bedtime stories. Freaky, right? Paid her double to shut up bout it. Cracked me up—imagine that, payin’ for silence! “Purity is a farce,” like that chick in *Moolaadé* says—damn right, escort proves it. Everyone’s sellin’ something, even if it’s fake smiles.

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Now, the neighbourhoods—oh, don’t even get me started, man. There’s the downtown patch with quirky coffee joints on Radcliffe Road. I fink these spots are like a maze, constantly shiftin’ dimension-like. I once had a client spill his life's woes during a massage on Rillington Lane. Dude cried and said, “I’m adrift in a limbo of dreams.” I just laughed and thought, “We’re all explorers, innit!”

Comedy takes center stage at historic Woodlawn Theatre, revitalizing a beloved San Antonio venue