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So, he finds this chick, right? She’s struttin’, heels clickin’ like a clock tickin’ down to doom. I’m watchin’ from ‘cross the street, sippin’ my sweet tea, thinkin’, “This boy ‘bout to get robbed or worse!” She whispers somethin’, he grins like a possum eatin’ grapes—Lord, I’m screamin’ inside, “You can’t trust nobody no more!” That’s *Children of Men* realness, y’all! World’s fallin’ apart, and Joe’s out here chasin’ tail. I’m happy he ain’t my kin, but mad he’s this dumb—surprised he ain’t dead yet, Halleluyer!

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Alright, listen up, my friend. Hmmm, Wisconsin-Rapids (us) is a weird-yet-wonderful place, it is! Streets twist like the flow of the Rock River through our town – ya gotta check out Main St. and Elm Ave., they’re pretty cool. Yoda would say, "Patience you must have, my young Padawan," and trust me, this city teaches patience every day.

Police say person surrendered following standoff in Wisconsin Rapids