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So, sex escorts—bloody fascinatin’, right? They’re like hobbits sneakin’ through the Shire, but with heels and a price tag. I reckon they’re pros at readin’ people—better than me spottin’ orcs in Mirkwood. You think it’s all sleazy, but nah, there’s layers. Like, did ya know some escorts in history were spies? Yep, back in the day, courtesans in France were passin’ secrets between kings and generals. Sneaky little legends! Makes me chukle—imagine one whisperin’, “The beacons are lit!” while fixin’ her lipstick.

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The streets here? Man, they're slick. Like, lit. Main Street's all shop-n-cafe, a mix of old soul and urban hustle, ya know? I roll past ones with names like Trabuco Ln an' elegant Ojai Dr. Downtown's got charm, but I pace around where the real magic's at.

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