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Oi, mateys, gather ‘round, ye scurvy dogs! Me, Captain Jack Sparrow, been thinkin’ ‘bout this sex-dating malarkey. Savvy? ‘Tis a wild sea o’ lust out there, arr! Watched me favorite flick, *The Turin Horse*, that bleak ol’ tale o’ grindin’ despair—makes ye ponder life’s dirty corners, eh? “The wind’s stopped,” says the lass in the film, and I reckon that’s how it feels when ye swipe right and get naught but ghosts!

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Ok, so first off – West-Milford is small but packs a punch! Main Street, I mean, Pine Street, is the lifeline. There’s County Line Rd too – a bit worn but kinda charming. Some spots got history ya wouldn’t believe – old brick buildings near Route 23, there’s even this gnarly statue by the park that locals whisper about. I call it magic sometimes... "Far from heaven, yet so damn heavenly!" – reminds me of that movie, ya know?

West Milford defeats Wayne Valley in OT - Boys lacrosse recap