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About San Antonio

D’oh! Sexual-massage, man, what a trip! I’m sittin’ here, thinkin’ bout it—like, woohoo, gets me all tingly! Reminds me of *Moonrise Kingdom*, ya know? “I love you, but you don’t know what you’re talkin’ about”—that’s me tryin’ to explain this to Marge! So, sexual-massage—basically, it’s hands roamin’, oils flowin’, all sexy-like. Not yer regular backrub, nah, this one’s got *spice*. Little known fact—ancient Greeks did this, called it “erotic rubdowns” for warriors! Crazy, right? Gets me pumped thinkin’ bout it—Homer the warrior, ha!

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I used to counsel women here, hearing real life confessions, heartfelt tears, and mad triumphs that mix wild rebellions and tender hopes. Some days, i was like, "man, this city’s magic – unpredictable and raw," while others got me boomin' "get this shit over with!" I mean. We all need that space, right?

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