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But the fakes? Christ, they’re everywhere! Some bloke’s “6’2, ripped”—turns up 5’5, beer gut. “You’re a disgrace to humanity!” I’d yell. And the ghostin’—don’t get me started. Chat for days, plan a shag, then poof—gone. “What am I supposed to do with that?!” like Joaquin screamin’ at his screen. Sex-dating’s a gamble, mate. You’re either balls deep or cryin’ wankin’ to Pornhub.

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Stroll down Maplecrest and pop into Cedar Lane. Yes, they’re real streets – not like some bogus names. You can even see quirky cafes. My fave? Old Brick Café on 3rd, tiny spot but full of life, kinda like our community. I'll tell ya, sometimes pissed off by snarky reviews, but y’know, life goes on, like "He spoke and his voice was a chill wind...".

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