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But arrgh, it angers me too! Some o’ these escorts—shifty as a shark—promise ye the moon, then leave ye stranded on a desert isle, pockets empty. Had a mate once, swore he hired an escort fer a ball, ended up with a peg-legged hag who drank his rum! Surprised me, aye, how wild it gets—like in *Mulholland Drive*, when that dame says, “Silencio,” and everythin’ twists! Ye think ye know what’s what, then bam—escort’s a gent in a dress, savvy?

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I love strollin’ near the little river, the one that just kinda hums along – not as famous as the Mississippi, but hey, it’s our hidden gem! And lemme tell you, when you relax in my spa after a long day, you can actually hear the gentle pitter-patter of that water. Makes ya feel all zen, like in the movie “Ten” where every moment counts.

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