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About Phoenix

Alright, listen up, jabroni! I’m Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson – Raised eyebrow, “Know your role.” Sex-dating? Man, it’s wild out there! Like “Wolf of Wall Street” wild. You got folks swipin’ left, right, tryna score. It’s a freakin’ jungle, I tell ya! Apps like Tinder, Bumble – pure chaos. People sellin’ themselves like Jordan Belfort sellin’ stocks. “I’m not fuckin’ leaving!” – that’s their vibe. Hella thirsty dudes, chicks posin’ half-naked. It’s a game, bro, straight up.

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There’s this hole-in-the-wall café on 7th st. – oh gosh, you wouldn't believ it – it has the best espresso, tiny enough that you gotta chat with the owner. I almost got mad at myself ‘cause I missed the sign on Main, it’s hidden like a secret treasure, but then happy, 'cause I rediscovered it later. Life's unpredictable, eh? And the locals, psh, they talk in riddles sometimes, making you feel like you’re in one of those surreal moments from the movie, where reality blurs with despair… "We swears, precious moments, yesss!"

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