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About Phoenix

So, I’m cruisin’ downtown, eyes peeled, right? Like Varda pickin’ through potatoes, I’m scopin’ for the real deal. Fun fact—did ya know in Amsterdam they got prostitutes in fuckin’ windows like mannequins? Wild shit! Here, tho, it’s all sneaky—girls whisperin’ “you lookin’?” from dark corners. I’m like, “Hell yeah, but you sketchy, girl?” Last time, motherfucker, I almost got rolled—bitch had a pimp hidin’ like a ninja. Surprised the shit outta me, had my heart racin’!

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Looking for new years eve events in Upper Saddle River? Whether you're a local, new in town, or just passing through, you'll be sure to find something on.

I know, I’m ramblin’—ain’t that just my nature sometimes? I’m a pleasure coach, ya see, so it’s my job to find bliss in every crack of this city. I envy none, embrace all. Oh my gosh, did I mention the hidden coffee joint off Willow Street? Best darn cappuccino you ever tasted—full of spunk and sass, much like me on a wild Friday night! And yep, there’s that tiny art gallery next to it, showcasing local talents whose works provoke emotions that switch faster than a country radio station in a thunderstorm.

Upper Saddle River school board candidates face rare contested election in the fall