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Alright, listen up, folks! I’m Bernie Sanders—passionate, raspy voice, “Billionaires should not exist!”—and I’m here to talk escort, yeah, that sleek ride from Ford. Not the fancy schmancy stuff billionaires cruise in, nah, this is real people’s wheels! Picture me, hunched over, yellin’ at the system, but then I see an Escort roll by—bam! Takes me back. Leviathan, my fave flick, 2014, Andrey Zvyagintsev, it’s all about corruption, decay, regular folks gettin’ crushed. “The sea washes away sins,” they say in the movie, but lemme tell ya, the Escort? It don’t wash away nothin’—it hauls your broke ass through the muck!

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Union-Hill-Novelty-Hill is all about the little things! U know, every corner's got a poppin' secret, every street echoes memories, and every park whispers, like, soulful, magical stories. Maybe we'll hit up the local flea market on Crescent St next time. It's, like, gossip central meets vintage heaven. And always remember, baby—life’s too short for boring vibes!

39th Annual Capitol Hill Ice Cream Party to Feature America’s Favorite Treats