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Da air’s thick, smoky, like Satine’s dressing room, ya feel me? “Come what may,” I mutter, dodgin’ creepy dudes hawkin’ wares. Den, outta nowhere—Lightbulb!—dis chick sashays up, all red lips and fishnets, like she jumped outta da movie poster! I’m tinkin’, “Dis is it, Gru, ya sly dog!” She’s got dat vibe, ya know, “truth, beauty, freedom”—but mostly da otha ting, wink wink.

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I have a soft spot for a quirky hamlet – Olde Towne. Now, there’s this cheeky little bookstore on Baker’s Lane that sells vintage erotica. As a sexologist, I’m always drainin’ life’s juiciest deets. A bunch of my clients have recounted their trysts there – and ohhh, honey, some nights I’ve been shocked, moved, and laughing my head off.

Street flooding causes traffic nightmare in Terrytown