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Weird fact—did ya know back in the 90s, folks used newspaper ads for this? “Single male, 30, seeks spicy night”—OG sex-dating, no filter! Now it’s all DMs and “wyd?” at 2 a.m. Progress, I guess? Still, gets me hype—every swipe’s a shot, YOLO, ya dig? Sometimes I’m sittin’ there, overthinkin’—*Should I send that dick pic? Nah, chill, Drake.* Inner monologue goin’ wild.

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See, my job lets me soak up all the small-town vibes. I see people comin' in stressed, undone, but then leavin' with that chill look. I chat 'bout the neighborhood quirks like the hidden mural on the wall of the corner store on Riverside Dr.—only locals know 'bout that, ya know? I get deep into conversations like, "Hey, did ya ever notice that lady feedin' pigeons by the old courthouse?" And oh boy, it gets philosophical real quick.

City of Taneytown announces details for municipal election in May; three council seats up for grabs