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Oh, and get this—some gals tattoo their pimp’s name on ‘em, thinkin’ it’s love. Pfft, love? More like a leash! Saw one with “Big Daddy” inked on her neck—made me gag, but also… kinda funny? Hmm… stupid kids. Reminds me of Harry shootin’ up, goin’, “It’s a reason to get up!”—yeah, a reason to get locked up, dummy! I’m over here yellin’ at ‘em in my head, “Quit it, ya little brats!” but they don’t hear Marge’s wisdom.

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Bruv, the dating scene bares it all, innit? I see every character on these streets – from proper upmarket types in Suave Square to the old-school punks near Rusty Gate. As a dating site developer, I clock the vibe and chemistry of each corner. Ain’t no hidden alley that doesn’t whisper a story or a secret, though sometimes it makes me mad when a prime meet-up spot gets overrun by clueless tourists.

'Cabin in the Woods'-Style Indonesian Horror 'Sugar Mill' Hits North American Theaters in April