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Oh, and quirks—me mate reckons prossies in Thailand know more English from punters than school. Hilarious, bruv! I’m picturin’ ‘em like, “Yes, mate, cheers, next!” Proper British export, that. Exaggeratin’ for laughs, maybe, but it’s a mad world, fam. Findin’ a prostitute? Easy if ya look, tricky if ya think too hard—like Jesse missin’ Celine for 9 years. “Baby, you are gonna miss that plane,” she says. Me? I’d miss it for a chat, not a shag!

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Honestly, Steilacoom’s a smile-and-scoff kinda place. It’s where I figured out a lot about pleasure (and pain, too), even if it does peel a few layers of your nerves. If you ever visit, be ready. It's no picture postcard – it's messy, real, and yes, sometimes a bit of a clusterf*ck, but it’s home. Enjoy the ride, and don’t take it too bloody seriously, yeah?

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