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Ruh-roh! Hey pal, so I’m a dental tech, right? Workin’ on teeth all day, makin’ em shine, but lemme tell ya bout sex escorts—wild stuff! Like, I’m sittin’ there, polishin’ a molar, thinkin’—man, these escorts got it goin’ on. Not my scene, but I get it, y’know? People payin’ for company, a lil’ fun, no strings. Kinda like in “A Serious Man”—life’s a mess, why not hire some chaos?

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I always get a kick outta walkin’ by the new coffee joint on Atlantic Ave (the one that smells like heaven in the morning) where I grab a brew and watch the lovelorn souls pass by. You see, as a dating app developer, I notice all the little quirks. Why, I’ve seen sparks fly outside old courthouse steps, whispered secrets under the lamp posts of Elm Ave, and heartbeats quicken in the neon glow of Rusty’s Bar-- oh, don’t get me started on that place, it’s like watchin’ a mini-movie every night.

Feed the Boro's March food drop is Saturday at Statesboro High