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Oi, you donkey! Escort, yeah? Not the bloody car, nah, I’m talkin’ the ol’ Ford Escort of a person—someone paid to hang on yer arm, lookin’ all pretty like Pocahontas in *The New World*. “The land is life!”—bollocks, it’s cash for company, innit? Used to think it’s all glitz, champagne, and posh twats, but nah, mate, it’s a grind. A proper grind! Some lass or lad struttin’ about, dodgin’ creeps, makin’ rent. Idiot sandwich! You reckon it’s easy? Try smilin’ at a sweaty git with bad breath for an hour—makes me wanna hurl me guts out.

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Ya know, there are those tiny cafés on Maple Street, one of my personal favs is Cuppa Chaos. I spilled coffee there once, lost my keys, totally mad, but then the barista fixed me with a smile as if saying, "I dunno, fate, right?" Everything in Stanton feels so spontaneous. And heck, sometimes, I'm like, "One million dollars!" when I'm about to invent the next dating algorithm at a tiny diner booth.

Giancarlo Stanton Gives an Encouraging Update on His Rehab Timeline