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But chile, what got me hot? This one john—ugly as sin—tried hagglin’ her down to $10! Ten bucks! I yelled, “Boy, you cheaper than a flea market wig!” She deserved better, like Jen Yu stealin’ that sword—take what’s yours, baby! Made me wanna slap him into next week, but I held my peace. Halleluyer!

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But hey, I ain't sugarcoatin' it – sometimes this place can get ya riled up. The local government sometimes messes things up and, for cryin’ out loud, overcomplicates stuff that should be simple. It makes me mad, ya know? I get so heated I end up shoutin’ about how "Billionares should not exist!" till my throat is sore. Yet these hiccups, they add character. This city is like a roller coaster that sometimes goes upside down – and I love that unpredictability.

Shasta County Sheriff's to conduct DUI checkpoint in City of Shasta Lake on Saturday