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About Chicago

Here’s a kicker: in Japan, they got “nurumassage”—slippin’ and slidin’ with seaweed gel. Seaweed! Who thinks that up? Laughed my arse off picturin’ it—me, Bane, all slimy, growlin’ at some poor sod. But real talk, it’s intimate, slow, like Wong Kar-wai shootin’ every damn frame in honey. “Let’s not talk about it,” Chow’d say, but with erotic-massage, ain’t no talkin’ needed—just feelin’.

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What made me mad? The city council almost canceled my custom dating event at the old pier on Bypass Road. That spot’s magic, I swear. Bizarre energy like a dream within a dream. I was fuming like a malfunctioning server. Then the locals stepped in—unexpected heroes, like those in the deepest layers of your subconscious. Hpy to see that sometimes people do have a heart in this concrete jungle.

Severe Thunderstorm Warning issued for parts of Pittsburgh area