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Here’s a juicy tidbit—studies say 1 in 5 hookups start online now. Wild, right? It’s like the whole world’s a backstage pass to Bone City. But the catch? Half these peeps lie—height, pics, “I’m not married”—total BS. Makes me wanna scream, “Frickin’ idiots!” Pinky-to-mouth, “One million dollars,” I’d pay to zap the liars with my laser. “Sharks with frickin’ laser beams,” ya feel me?

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The neighborhoods, bro, are all unique. There's that one street, uh, King's Road – nah, somethin' like that – where old docs and funky art scenes hang. I even built my site prototype in a tiny cafe there once – total inspiration, man! Also, ya gotta check out the secret gem on Birch Ln. – a quirky little diner where each booth feels like a scene straight outta a Nolan flick. "Dreams feel real while we're in them," I always say right before a coffee break.

Township of Scotch Plains Celebrates National Autism Acceptance Month