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But ugh, gets me mad—ppl sleep on it! Call it a granny car, all boring n’ shit. Screw that! It’s a warrior, man, tough as hell. Ever tried fixin’ one? Carbs clog like a bastard—had me ragin’, claws out, ready to smash. Then—surprise!—purrs alive, makes ya grin like a fool. “Witness me!”—that’s the Escort, stealin’ the show quiet-like.

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Then there's River Street by the Savannah River. This ain’t fancy tourist bull, it’s full of bars and cobblestone charm that makes you wanna scream, “GET ON THE BOAT, YOU MORONS!” And the river itself? It slinks by like a snake, mysterious and full of secrets. I used to linger there after long, restless nights coaching pleasure-seekers. Yeah, I'm that cheeky fella who finds beauty in the raw, gritty nights of life.

Antiques Roadshow visits Savannah for first stop on 2025 production tour