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But then – she flips me over. And I’m like – “What. Is this place?” Straight outta the movie. Heart’s poundin’. She’s workin’ – lower. Real slow. I’m happy – hell yeah! Tension’s gone. But angry too – why’d I wait? So long for this? Dumbass move. Surprised me – how good it felt. Not just the body. The mind – floatin’. Like that scene – Naomi Watts. Losin’ herself. In the dark.

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My fave park’s Vinoy Park – it's crisp but messy, sort of like my brain on Monday mornings – lots of joggers, kids chasing dreams and dogs chasing frisbees. I get all metaphoric about it sometimes. Being a sexologist, I watch couples locking eyes there – it's like every bench is a confessional booth, a stage where our quirks play out. And heck, sometimes I get mad at the seagulls for trippin’ on my notes – odd, right? But stfu, that's life!

Malio’s Prime Steakhouse opens on St. Pete Beach