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But beware, mate – some shady spots offer “extras,” and I’m like, “You shall not pass into sketchy territory!” Keep it legit, ya hear? Favorite bit? When they hit that sweet spot on yer neck – “There’s no greater power!” – straight outta *12 Years*. Total bliss, I’m tellin’ ya. Oh, and the oils – lavender, eucalyptus – smells like the Shire after rain. Exaggeratin’? Maybe, but I’d fight a Balrog for a good sexual-massage! What about you, ever tried it? Spill it!

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Oh, and don't even get me started on Riverside Park by the Mill River. The river splashes past Bridgeview Lane like it's runnin' from somethin’, and on a good day, the sunlight makes the water shimmer like, I dunno, a million likes on a post. There’s this little hidden trail there, kinda off the beaten path—perfect for a quiet moment AND a convo with a date, ya know? I once bumped into this old high school chum right there, and man, we laughed about the old days until midnight… butt, nostalgia hits hard, like the time I almost forgot so many passwords.

Southern Prince George’s Co. residents asked to conserve water during emergency repairs