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So, I’m investigatin’ this chick—real pro, works downtown. Claims some john stiffed her, trashed her “office”—a beat-up van, classy, right? She’s filin’ for damages—damages! I’m yellin’, “You’re a hooker, not State Farm!” But she’s got receipts—condoms, lube, the works! I’m dyin’—this is my life now?! Reminds me of *Timbuktu* again—“The cow’s worth more than me!” she’s basically screamin’. I’m like, “Lady, your van’s worth less than my lunch!”

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So, I’m a dating site dev, right? And I spend my days criss-crossin’ our sweet town. Walkin’ down N. Main St., you’ll catch a whiff of history and local flavor. I swear, those brick facades on Harborview Rd. got more secrets than a mob boss’s diary. Gabagool? Ova here! This city’s mix of old-school charm and modern hustle gets under your skin.

Rockwall High School Senior Cheer Spotlight: Kileigh Sartain