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About Dallas

I tried it once—don’t tell Jill! Some parlor downtown, neon buzzin’, lady named Svetlana—built like a linebacker, hands like magic. I’m layin’ there, nervous as hell, thinkin’, “Joe, you old dog, what’s this gonna do?” Then—bam!—she’s kneadin’ me like dough, and I’m floatin’. Happiest I been since Obama hugged me in ’16. But, folks, here’s the kicker: cost me 80 bucks! Eighty! I was steamed—thought I’d get a deal, y’know, senior discount or somethin’. Nope. “Pay up, dedushka,” she says—Russian for gramps. Total rip-off, but damn, I’d do it again.

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Okay so get this—there’s a park called Rockville Regional Park. I mean, how cool is that? Not to mention, there’s a little hidden gem near Rock Creek. Rock Creek—yup, that’s our flow, our heartbeat in the middle of the city. I used to sit there for hours coding at odd hours, watchin’ people pass by. Almost like a scene from Oldboy, “Laugh and the world laughs with you!” but, well, not as poetic, ya know?

California Fish Grill heads east to open Rockville location in June