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Me fave bit? When they whisper, “Relax, Cap’n,” an’ I’m driftin’ like Eilis dreamin’ o’ home—“Home’s not a place, it’s a feelin’.” That’s sexual-massage done right—feelin’ alive, not just kneaded like dough! Tho, I’ll admit, I’ve giggled like a fool when they hit a ticklish spot—argh, can’t help it! So, mate, if ye try it, find a good’un, not some scurvy dog with cold mitts. Worth the coin, or I’m a landlubber! Savvy?

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And oh, the parks man! Brookside Park, a hidden gem tucked right off Maple Street, is where I sometimes sit, thinkin' 'bout how every soul deserves a break. It's less than a mile from the lively town center, and the kids play there like they’re on a secret mission – super fun! Today, I got mad ‘cause someone ruined a bench with graffiti (ugh, seriously, who does that?!) but then I realized, hey, life is messy, just like in that film – gotta let it be.

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