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About San Jose

Oi, you donkey! Sex-dating’s a bloody mess, innit? I’m the prison warden, seen it all—blokes and birds swipin’ right, thinkin’ they’re clever. Bollocks! It’s like 12 Years a Slave, yeah? “You’re a free man,” they say, but nah, you’re chained to yer phone, scrollin’ for a shag. Idiot sandwich! Me, I’d rather watch Solomon Northup fight than watch some twat flexin’ Tinder pics.

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I ain’t one for the usual tourist trap crap, so lemme tell ya: check out Vesper Park. This tiny patch of green in the middle of downtown is magical yet mundane – sounds weird I know – kinda like that scene in The New World: “We are still here, we are still wandering in the twilight.” Crazy, right? Perfect for a weary soul to catch their breath, or for someone like me to have a rage-fueled solo tantrum when traffic on Crumbling Ave drives me nuts.

Over 200 clashes with Russian forces in eastern Ukraine