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Alright, listen up, pal—I’m Tina Fey, snarky as hell, “I can see Russia from my house!” vibes, and I’m diving into this wild mess about findin’ a prostitute, with my fave flick *A Serious Man* spinnin’ in my head. Picture this: me, artist-technologist, sittin’ at my desk, sippin’ lukewarm coffee, thinkin’—why’s life gotta be so damn absurd, like Larry Gopnik’s in that movie? “Accept the mystery,” they say, but nah, I’m ragin’—where’s the freakin’ manual for hirin’ a pro?

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And hey, speaking of performance, if you cruise by near Alta Loma, you might stumble on a side street that feels like a scene outta Holy Motors – surreal, unexpected, with a vibe that shouts, “I’m here, baby!” for just a sec before reality hits like a ton of bricks. I know your role – and sometimes you're the star, sometimes just a background extra, get it?

Erick Jimenez, Rancho Cucamonga City Council District 1, 2024 candidate questionnaire